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- Years old:
Move over, June.
Here are the things I think everyone should consider before they get married. This is it.
Before, you were being nagged about when you were going to get married. It might not be as extreme as that for all couples, but after being married for some time, the raw and crude things are no longer, well, raw or crude. You might ask or be asked to evaluate nose hair or pull off a blackened fingernail—things you would never do or ask while dating—because now you two are one and almost nothing is embarrassing anymore. I used to think that the best test of whether you could live with someone else forever is to ask yourself if you could put up with their biggest flaw—or the worst version of this person—for the rest of your life.
If your partner is somewhat of a curmudgeon now, he or she will probably only become crankier and more stubborn as the years go by. Conversely, the best things you love about a person could hold you steady through the inevitable tough times.
15 things to remember during your early years of marriage
Little annoyances like a nail biting habit or leaving filled water glasses everywhere are really easy to overlook during a relationship when the bigger things—the way your partner makes you laugh or how beautiful you feel around him or her—attract your attention more.
Doing chores becomes sexy in a way you would never imagine.
The two biggest things are learning how to fight more productively and how to communicate in ways that might not be natural to you but make more sense to the other person. Every couple should go through at least one really tough time together before they get married, just to see how the other person handles such things.
10 important things every couple should do before getting married
The problem is, when two people live together, there is no more Business of Your Own. Your Own Business is closed. You have to run everything by the partners.
And if there are too many conflicts of interest, the business may go under, freeing the partners to once again open up smaller concerns by themselves. Like all businesses, couples engage in endless meetings to discuss areas of management concern and division of labor.
Being part of a permanent team has its benefits. You come to rely on the other person to remember and take care of certain information Psychologists call this transactive memory.
12 things you must do right after your wedding
But what a beautiful dance it can be. This story was originally published in October and was updated on May 25, in slideshow format and to meet Lifehacker style guidelines.
By Melanie Pinola. Photo: Rawpixel. List slides.
8 things every woman should do before getting married
Photo: Sjale Shutterstock. Photo: Halfpoint Shutterstock. Photo: Notto Yeez Shutterstock.
The little things matter a whole lot more. Photo: fizkes Shutterstock.
1. your spouse is not going to complete you.
You both have to change to make the marriage work. Photo: LightField Studios Shutterstock.
Photo: Jacob Lund Shutterstock. Photo: simona pilolla 2 Shutterstock.