- I am 47
Erica is a passionate writer who shares inspiring ideas and lifestyle tips on Lifehack.
What does it take to get a man to truly commit and want only you? What men desire most is a woman who inspires them to be their best self. Being that woman is a much different mindset than what most women typically do these days. Instead of focusing on the feelings and experience they create for the man, the woman fixates on her own wants, her own worries, her own fears. Forget about just getting commitment. Here are four ways to reach a man deeply and make him want to commit and devote himself fully to you.
I have a confession to make, when I was revising this article to get it ready for publishing, it was three ways to make him commit… not four. The original article came off cold, harsh, and even depressing because I had left out the most important element of all when it comes to how to get him to commit. So in this revised version, I made sure to convey the one most important piece of the puzzle immediately at the beginning. Who you choose is by far the most important factor in all relationships. So one of the most important ways to make a guy commit is to understand the reality of relationships, love, and your specific guy.
In my personal life, I meet all sorts of people. Some people are easy and fun to be around … I can spend hours with them, talking about things, laughing about things, and just genuinely enjoying their company.
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On the other hand, there are people who I meet that immediately make me feel uncomfortable and defensive. I feel like I have to constantly be on my toes, choose my words carefully, and being around them is far from pleasurable.
As a writer who talks about dating and relationships, what has always amazed me when it comes to relationships is how people completely disregard compatibility. Sometimes the relationship started out well and then over time disintegrated into something that resembles resentment and abuse rather than love or respect.
Personally, I needed to date around and experience several relationships before I had a good understanding of what I actually wanted, valued, and what resonated with me in a relationship. In my late teens and early twenties, for example, I knew that I wanted a girl that had a hot, fit body and a beautiful face. It took me a while to figure that out. When I realized it, I mentally revisited my past relationships and realized something very important that I want to pass along to you…. Even if she wanted it to work. I can clearly see now, years later after all the emotion and attachment is completely gone, we never would have reached that level of intimacy that is ultimately valuable to me in a relationship.
All those emotions have nothing to do with love or compatibility. Real relationship success is not about making a relationship with someone work when, at your core, you and he are ultimately incompatible.
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Do you feel better about yourself? About life? About the things that upset you? Or … do you feel insecure? How much you want it to work is the worst indicator of a good relationship in fact, usually the people who tell me how desperately they want something to work are highlighting how incompatible they actually are from their partner.
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The good news is that some of the most powerful seductresses the world has ever known were not the most beautiful. My advice is to strive to be as attractive as you possibly can, and fortunately, this one is largely in your control. Whatever your supposed fault is, I can guarantee that your self-doubt is far more unattractive. Nobody is perfect and no man demands or expects perfection.
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But those who own their imperfections are massively more attractive than those who do not or cannot. There is definitely something attractive about a woman who owns her imperfections and is totally OK with them. Conversely, being insecure is a massive energy drain to you and the people around you. Insecurity stinks of desperation and desperation kill attraction.
So change what you can to be sexier and more physically alluring and appealing. Spend more time at the gymeat healthierlearn how to apply makeup to enhance your best features, train your voice to be pleasant and seductive tape recording yourself works wondersmaster attractive body language and facial expressions, dress to flatter your figure, you get the point.
4 ways to make him commit and want only you
What makes you irreplaceable in the eyes of your man? Your ability to reach deep into the depths of who he is and inspire him. To put it more bluntly, you must offer something that is much more rare and valuable than sex if you want him to treat you as something important in his life.
I mean … duh, right? And yet this obvious truth gets distorted and overlooked.
6 effective ways to make him love you more
Sex is readily available. Men have a deep unconscious fear that their life, their contribution to the world and their existence is pointless, meaningless, and inificant. At the same time, every man has hopes, dreams, and aspirations. Your ultimate gift as a woman is to inspire him to do that, to realize his ultimate potential as a man. Creating the foundation for a strong, healthy relationship comes down to putting energy into the correct places.
Worrying and stressing is not putting energy into the correct places. But in the end, those emotions do nobody a favor — they repel men, they waste your energy, and they make everyone miserable. The only way to get out of that cycle and move towards building a firm foundation that le to a good relationship is to find your own self-love and fulfillment independent of a relationship. The energy you put into the relationship is the only thing that matters.
It is a simple truth that people value those who bring a unique, special, meaningful value to the table. Sex is not enough. And loving him the way you want to be loved is not enough either. Your energy would be better spent figuring out what this is rather than worrying about him leaving you. It is typical that if a guy is going to commit to you in an exclusive official relationship, he will do so within the first three months of dating.
Regardless of time together, if you are missing one of the key factors that get him to commit then you need to start paying attention to those things immediately. One of two things will happen: Either he will let you go in which case you will know for certain that he was unwilling to ever be in a committed relationship with you or he will come back, usually within 1 to 3 weeks, and hint at having a change of heart.
In order to understand how to make him want you, you need to know what men really want in a woman. It requires you understand what things actually reach his heart and make him want to commit because he would never want to lose you. As a golden rule with men, here is something to always remember: Men do not fall in love from sleeping with you. Only women fall in love from sleeping with a man.
Doing these 6 things can make your man love you more every day
I hope this article helped you better understand what makes a man commit. But there is more you need to know.
There is one defining moment in every relationship that determines if it will last, or if you will be left heartbroken…. At some point, he will ask himself: Is this the woman I want to commit myself to?
The answer will determine whether the relationship deepens or ends. Do you know how a man decides a woman is girlfriend or wife material? Do you know what inspires a man to want to commit? Another major problem is if you think he might be losing interest or pulling away. Do you know what to do when this happens? If not, you run the risk of making the most common relationship-ruining mistakes. I love writing articles to help people free themselves from suffering and have clarity in their love life.
I have a degree in Psychology and I've dedicated the last 20 years of my life to learning everything I can about human psychology and sharing what gets people out of struggling with life and into having the life they really want. If you want to contact me, feel free to reach out on Facebook or Twitter. I love a guy…. I have seen him 3years ago. After so many texts he told me that he is completely not intersted…I was heartbroken at that time.
After that I tried so much to impress him through my talents and my confidence…Eventually i started noticed him staring at me. He tells me exactly the same things I tell him, its like we both want the same thing but how can I be sure? Not long ago he asked for my and now he calls me every night and we talk for hours, I asked him why he wanted my . But how do I know if he wants me?
I enjoy reading your articles. He lives an hour away, we only text once a week or so, and only see each other every 2 or 3 months. But how long do I have to wait for him to want to see me more?
What should I say to him? Hey there. The stress arising from thinking about his slow reaction time to my texts, and the fact that we seldom go out together are driving me up against the wall. And so I finally but gently told him that I was seriously exhausted, not just because of him, and that I needed to focus on myself first so I was implying that I would be leaving him out there for awhile while I do my own thing. I know its difficult to stop.