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Come back next week for more! I consulted Dr. Morgan CutlipPh. Yikes, this sounds familiar.


This copy is for your personal non-commercial use only. There is something undeniably romantic about a bar: dim lighting, intimate seating encouraging you to get close and a glass of liquid courage helping your pre-date jitters melt away. Of course, alcohol and dating are longtime lovers.

As an anxious person, being sober—and being in control of my body—brings me comfort. I thought university was the toughest time to avoid alcohol, with the peer pressure and the constant partying, but entering the online dating world has brought an even bigger challenge: finding a partner who respects my sobriety. In a recent survey by the dating app Bumble Canada, which is used by four million Canadians, 67 per cent of users said they would be interested in sober dating.

How to date when you are newly sober

Your drinking status is right there in your profile: On Bumble, 75 per cent identify as social drinkers, 3. No doubt, drinkers are swiping left on us non-drinkers, too. Whenever I fantasized about my life as a single something, I envisioned myself in Sex and the Citysipping on a cosmo with my girlfriends before meeting up with my hot date in a buzzing New York City cocktail bar. How they react tells me everything I need to know.

If you do decide to meet someone at a bar, pay attention to how you feel and use that as part of the dating elimination process. He was a self-proclaimed cocktail connoisseur, so I was apprehensive, but I had told him I was sober when he suggested going for drinks.

When I arrived, he told me he had already asked the bartender if they could make a mocktail—I sipped on one that tasted like an adult lemonade and another that had notes of lavender. He had two Old Fashioneds and stopped drinking when I stopped. He was fully present the whole time, holding eye contact with me and casually touching my leg while we exchanged stories about our most embarrassing dates.

How to date while sober

And that can happen just about anywhere. Copyright owned or d by Toronto Star Newspapers Limited. All rights reserved. To order copies of Toronto Star articles, please go to: www. Report an error. Journalistic Standards.

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It may have been your go-to invitation to tell your date that the two of you should grab a drink together.