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We include products we think are useful for our readers. If you buy through links on thiswe may earn a small commission. How do you continue to date in hopes of finding a serious relationship — without seeming desperate? The good news? Being single has tons of perks — hello, taking spontaneous road trips and being the boss of your own life.


in. In person and online I have met many wonderful people who wish to be in a relationship with another person. They have so much to give, yet they find it difficult to connect, they see the problem as themselves, the people that they are pursuing, almighty fate.

Desperate is an indication that you are ready to change. Observation : It might seem obvious, but the start to cure relationship desperation is by dating and making new friends. Not everyone you date will become your ificant other, but it will greatly increase your chances of finding someone who can be your love. Dating allows you to experience small, light interactions with a variety of people, and will help you to begin cultivating an idea of what you want in a partner.

As you identify these characteristics, you will come closer to finding someone who is compatible with you long term. Every relationship has a purpose to teach you, and you in turn teach them. Conversely, maybe say yes to one person you might not otherwise. Set no expectations, and just spend time with a complete stranger in a comfortable setting for 1 Desperate for a relationship 2 hours and speak with them. If this makes you feel anxious, prep like you might for a job intereview. Practice talking points, learn a few jokes, and work on your listening skills. Observation: Many people are blind to who they are in the relationship and focus on only what they want from a partner.

As you identify characteristics that you might want from dating, it is important to ask yourself if you are are able to offer similar qualities to someone else.

How to stop feeling desperate when you’re single

Identify situations where you demonstrate qualities a potential partner might want in a partner. These are not material characteristics, or even physical ones. They might just be healthy, happy, smart, and kind. Be aware of your good traits, know you can be attractive just for who you are. Keep those traits shiny by using them, and keep them safe.

Action: When something about a partner disappoints you, ask yourself if you have ever made someone else feel how you are feeling. Building empathy for people in their conditions allows you to approach new relationships with compassion and a realistic sense of who you are, which is beautiful trait. Make a list of things you have to offer, and make a list of things that you would like to change. Consistently working on those things you want to be or have in your life gives you a challenge, and as you overcome them you will be astonished at how much easier they get each time.

It shows people in your life that you are willing to change, that you have the necessary self awareness to get better at something! Observation: Fantasizing about having a relationship is dangerous, and may create undo tension in a new, budding relationship that will not be able to withstand strong desire and expectations. Instead, take baby steps when dating. Take your interactions with a date them one date at a time, think about how you can have the best experience, instead of the best result.

A good way to start off dating is to treat your date like you would a new friend: ask them to hang out and do fun things together, keep your communications respectful and not too heavy, and be genuine about your actions. Action : Reset your standards to have a good time instead of find a life partner immediately.

Not everyone will be your best date, your favorite date, the most exciting time.

How to stop being desperate for a romantic relationship.

Those dates happen in movies frequently, but in life they are so very rare and precious. Observation: Some very smart and interesting people have trouble listening and sharing their passions about things in ways that can transcend their immediate peer group. Passions are what make folks interesting and great to be around.

But unless you feel like limiting your partner pool to for instance: Swedish furniture makers that are vegan and regularly talk about physics, you are going to have to learn to talk about your passions in an interesting and sharable manner. If you are truly bright, if you are truly smart, you can explain anything to anyone.

Action: Try explaining something you are very interested about to another person. Do they look away? Do their eyes glaze over? Do they respond with questions or do they change the topic? Do not get discouraged: speaking about topics engagingly can be taught!

My personal favorite way is volunteer work and chatting with whoever I am serving and my favorite reference for public speaking is Talk Like TED. Some seriously actionable content in there. Try refraining from referencing television, books, niche pop-culture, podcasts etc. Explain the concepts. Conversely, people also take advantage of desperation. This is tough; desperation comes with a lot of other baggage than just companionship- it places responsibility on another person for your emotional well being.

In desperation I have seen people do crazy things, and become the worst version of themselves. You probably do not want that.

Action: Put the ball back in your court, and take back your control so you do not feel desperate. In order to have the best chances at dating, you must be at your best to offer your best self. Only you will be able to stop yourself from being desperate, because if you meet someone who senses your desperation there is a good chance they will want to leave.

When you feel good about yourself too, you are less likely to be taken advantage of by someone who enjoys the power imbalance of desperation.

Why you only find love when you stop looking for it

Feeling good about yourself in a healthy and realistic view is a way to protect yourself from both the good and the bad. I also would like to add this:. If you would like to date someone, I recommend asking that person out in person. This shows bravery, confidence, and you will know if you have some chemistry with that person before you meet them and maybe a sense of what you can do together.

You will be able to do it again!

Not every date will be the best date- make your goal to have fun and get to know some one not just sleep with them. Girls, boys and any object of your attraction can smell this miles away and knows you are being inauthentic unless you are both in agreement about sleeping together. Karma, my friends, is real.

Find someone to love and who can love you in return. Do not expect someone to want to date you. There are a zillion reasons why someone would want to date you, but also there are lots of reasons why not.

Why am i so desperate for someone to love me?

Do not take it personally. That will only add to your desperation. You are perfect just the way you are.

You are constantly changing though, all the time in every moment, every time you work on something, every time you put in more effort. The person that is right for you just might be right for the person you are changing into.

Goodluck my friends, have a good time making connections out there! Note: This content is originally from my Quora answer on the same topic.

5 s you are desperate for love

Get started. Open in app. Natalie LeRoy. in Get started. Get started Open in app. How to stop being desperate for a romantic relationship. I also would like to add this: If you would like to date someone, I recommend asking that person out in person. More from Natalie LeRoy Follow.

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Love is a curious thing and most people are looking for it.