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Those women who do take umbrage at this representation and if you are one of them, I fervently hope that this book will inspire you to let go of those concerns are met with the same response given to all women who complain about how society or individuals depict them as objects of ridicule. This is standard procedure. But what happens when similar discussions of misogyny or even garden-variety sexism are raised? What happens when a woman criticizes the actions of one man or a group of men, and connects these actions with the gender inequality that thrives in broader society?


It is no surprise that as a part of feminist conversations, most men find it hard to own up, take responsibility for their actions or just accept the blame.

Clementine ford on how to be a male feminist

The phrase NotAllMen has emerged out of these ideas and resolves to exclude men from any liability against their actions and actions of fellow men. Here are 6 reasons why NotAllMen takes us further away from the important conversations about Gender Equality:. Not everything revolves around men and masculinity.

For once, men are not the centre of discussion here. Yes, we know not all men are rapists, not all men are abusers — but in more ways than one, all hetero-cis men have and currently participate in the oppression of women. You care about neither.

Not all men: a brief history of every dude's favorite argument

Addressing violence and abuse against men is important. If a woman is sharing an uncomfortable and traumatic experience with you, the worst thing you can do at the time is tell her not all men are like that.

Her lived experience is more important than your ignorance and your half-pleading attempt to show that YOU are not like that. Who are nice men?

Thank you!

Men who are polite and civil? Is masculinity so fragile that men require validation and gratitude every time they show half-decent behaviour?

Check your behaviour. Question your decisions. Have you ever, consciously or unconsciously made someone uncomfortable?

Listen up men: saying '#notallmen' is incredibly insensitive to survivors

Do you think all women are poor drivers? How many times do you get up to take food without a woman handing it to you?

YesAllMen — Check yourself. We are not born as man-haters. It may have missed your notice but most sexual offenders are men, and while you may not be one of them — enough people are.

Women are violated, abused and humiliated for the sole reason that they are women. Smashing the Patriarchy is important for both men and women. But if you need that reminder every time a woman questions or calls out a man, you are not an ally. Featured image used for representative purpose only.

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Content warning: This article contains mentions of or references to sexism, sexual harassment and sexual assault.


Warning: This story contains discussion and description of sexual abuse, assault and trauma.