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While they not be meeting and having sex with that other persontheir fantasy moments take away time, sometimes money and are a step-by-step, tip-toing into emotional cheating. People, adults should have some things, even in the most perfect, balanced growing marriages of their own.
Their own time for sports, a show they like, things a friend they have known for a time But, like a who we appoint a parole officer to report to, or give up a bit of your freedom, by having unannounced drop in's to what and how you are doing, as they regrow trust over time - someone who has cheated or has a real history of actions that 'hurt' the others feelings, needs to understand that they be a bit angry at being asked or the assumption of In her case, you should be able to ask to her phone at times.
Some assumptions from our partners should be met with emotionally mature pause and consideration of 'what are they really saying here to me? Some things should be fought for, explained.
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My issues at the time were primarily about stress. My WIFE blamed it on grief. I was freaking out about my wife's fucked up behavior, and stressing about being the only responsible adult in the house. The meds didn't make the problems we had any better, they just made me more apathetic about them.
That's not good, IMO. I can where they would help people who focus on their mi rtune, misery and self-pity. Apathy about THAT can be good. But apathy about bouncing checks, lying and unfair divisions of labor is weak.
But that was all a couple of exciting hills in the rollercoaster of life ago. We're still a far cry from where I want to be, but nowhere near that brink anymore. I appreciate the condolences.
But there's a difference between realizing that getting dumped sucks and going on about how there's something screwed up in your ex's head, how it's weird that she's a couples counselor because she believes in passion, how probably her future relationships screw up because of it, etc. It makes you sound bitter, which is never attractive. One of the hazards of dating is that you're not going to match with everyone you date. You weren't what she was looking for and she did nothing wrong by telling you so.
Lick your wounds, but move forward without putting her down for being honest about her feelings. Tell me what you're into.
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